tonight's the night...

...the night I've been dreading for 3 years.
My senior recital!
For the past 4 years (since I've started playing the organ,) I always think, "oh, I'll practice more tomorrow, or next week, or after spring break, or over the summer..." etc.
But now...
there is no tomorrow. there is only tonight.
and I know that I cannot play any of my pieces perfectly even when I'm alone, much less when there' s an audience sitting behind me.
And all those times when I've thought, "oh, I'll practice harder tomorrow?" do I regret it?
not sure. I've had an otherwise fabulous college experience, which I doubt I would have had I spent 3-4 hours a day locked up in a dark and lonely practice room!
but now, whatever my decisions were on all those individual days when I prioritized my time, and each day by itself seemed to be not all that important, I now look back and realize how collectively it will all make a difference.
My not-so-musically literate friends who have heard me (imperfectly) play my pieces have honestly told me they didn't hear any mistakes. which is why I haven't invited many musicians...tee hee...
but I know the few will hear the mistakes, or some of them. but it doesn't matter.
As the nice note my boss left for me yesterday reminds me, I am playing for God. The end goal being that of helping people to worship God better while at church.
The Glory of God.

Soli Deo Gloria